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On my first day at Glow I can remember getting ready and saying to Lee, well moaning to Lee did I have to go as I didn't like people and they might eat me. Truth be told, I was waffling on because my anxiety was skyrocketing. I even said to him I hope they don't make us wear those silly name stickers so everyone remembers your name but you always end up leaving with it on you for the duration of your day as you forget and you're still too nervous to ever tell anyone else they've got theirs on. (Or it might just be me that left with theirs on one day. At 28 name stickers might be a good idea, my memory isn't as great as it used to be. I will honestly say I couldn't remember everyone's name. I needed them more than ever.)
Glow was relaxing, positive and so open. It was informal and I believe everyone felt included. We all came from different backgrounds, history, and although similar experiences in life the one thing we all had in common was that we were in that class for our own reasons and we all got along. It wasn't long before we were making jokes and having banter. I met so many amazing, strong, intelligent women that I hope to remain good friends with.
When asked on the first day why we had come to Glow I was honest and my exact words were "because I don't know who I am anymore." As I've written about before, I was in an abusive, controlling relationship where everything was near enough decided and demanded for me.
Whether it be clothing, going out with family, and even taking days off work because it suited them it can be such a scary, daunting feeling when you suddenly have control back. When I left my relationship I was fearful of making decisions incase it was the wrong one and I tried so hard to say yes to everything and people-pleasing which meant not sharing my opinion incase it wasn't allowed. I didn't know what my thoughts and feeling were towards something because for so long I'd been living through someone else's expectations.
In six weeks The Real Me program with Glow has shown me I can be confident in who I am with others, not just online. I've also learned to not be afraid of sharing opinions and standing up for myself. The main thing I was struggling with when starting Glow was direction, there were so many things spiraling in my head that I thought I needed or wanted to do by a certain age but when I sat and thought about it I realised I was doing what was expected of me instead of what I actually wanted.
Pushing boundaries and stepping out of my comfort zone is scary and anxiety-filling but it built confidence, strength, and also self-belief. I believe in myself and I have set smart goals
to start achieving the things I want to. During the program, I had the opportunity to take part in team-building exercises and also rockclimbing.
That was so much fun. I said I'd try and I did, I went in with an open mind and had so much fun before even attemping this. I pushed myself and I gave it a go. Did I go as far as I wanted? No! But it's easier to climb the wall higher in your head when your hands aren't burning, going red and your feet are secure on the ground.
Glow's The Real Me Program has had such a positive impact in my life that I know I'd still be feeling a bit stuck if I hadn't gotten the encouragement and pushed myself to go.
If you or anyone you know could benefit from a program like this I highly suggest you check out their website for more information.
Taken from their website www.glowni.com
Glow's Mission Statement:
To empower women and girls in Northern Ireland (and beyond) to discover their true identity and purpose so they can achieve their full potential.
Have you ever completed a course like Glow? What is something that's built your confidence?
